A Woman Should……

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE….. one old boyfriend she can imagine going back to and one who reminds her of how far she’s come…

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE…..enough money within her control to move out and rent a place of her own, even if she never wants to or needs to…

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE..something perfect to wear if the employer, or date of her dreams wants to see her in an hour…

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ….a youth she’s content to leave behind….

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …..a past juicy enough that she’s looking forward to retelling it in her old age….

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE ….a set of screwdrivers, a cordless drill, and a black lace bra…

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …..one friend who always makes her laugh… and one who lets her cry…

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …..a good piece of furniture not previously owned by anyone else in her family…

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …..eight matching plates, wine glasses with stems, and a recipe for a meal, that will make her guests feel honored…

* A WOMAN SHOULD HAVE …..a feeling of control over her destiny…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…how to fall in love without losing herself…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…how to quit her job, break up with a lover and confront a friend without ruining the friendship….

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…when to try harder… and when to walk away…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD  KNOW…that she can’t change the length of her calves, the width of her hips, or the nature of her parents…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD   KNOW…that her childhood may not have been perfect…but its over…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…what she would and wouldn’t do for money or love…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…how to live alone… even if she doesn’t like it…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW..whom she can trust, whom she can’t, and why she shouldn’t take it personally…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…where to go…be it to her best friend’s kitchen table…or a charming inn in the woods…when her soul needs soothing…

* EVERY WOMAN SHOULD KNOW…what she can and can’t accomplish in a day…a month…and a year…

Have an awesome day…..!!

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Simple Sweet Happiness……:)

#Happiness Comes From Satisfaction, Not Idleness…..

You ever meet a “trust fund” kid?

You’ve probably seen these kids…young and rich, because their parents or grandparents did something amazing.

You ever notice how many of these kids are addicts, assholes and generally entitled and miserable wastes of space?

It’s not the money that ruined these kids (and they are truly ruined,) it’s the IDLENESS.

So many folks (especially in the US) seem to think that happiness comes from idleness…

You ask most folks what they’d do if they won the Mega Millions and they emphatically say “NOTHING.”

But doing NOTHING (or spending your day doing things that mean NOTHING even if they take up a lot of time) is a great way to end up hollow and bitter and very, very sad.

The fact is the happiest people in the world aren’t the ones with the most time on their hands, they’re the ones who do something SATISFYING with their time and who see CONCRETE RESULTS from the work they do.

Now, not everybody can (or should) start a business. And if you have a job
you hate but need to keep to pay the bills I totally understand.

But if you want to be happy, don’t fantasize about crazy cars, big houses and long formless days.

Just try to give yourself 15 minutes a day where you work on something that satisfies you. Something that makes you feel like you’re making some kind of mark (no matter how small) on the world.

# Love More, Care Less…..

We live in a world of constant connection where every bad thing in the world is delivered to our eyeballs in hyped up and obnoxious stereo.

We hear about every death, every shooting, every car crash, every environmental disaster, every scam.

And under that CRUSH of misery and anger our  adrenal systems go haywire, our brains get flooded with chemicals and all we want to do is stuff our heads under the pillow and wait for it al to be over.

Stop caring.
Not about everything, but about most things.

The fact is that you personally can’t have any impact at all on 99.99% of the world’s problems. You simply don’t have the time or the bandwidth to Fix everything.

#Be Grateful For Your Tragedies, They Make You Who You Are …..

There’s this beautiful quote I want to share:

“A happy life consists not in the absence, but in the mastery of hardships.”

We all have tragedies. We all have horrible things that have happened in our lives that have melted our resolve, brutalized our hearts and made us want to give up.

We all go through crap. All of us. Yours is worse than some and a lot better than others. All I can say is you can either live life as a victim or you can pick up your chin.
Be grateful, help others and survive.

That’s what I’m doing……

– “Be a voice, not an echo; Speak your truth even if your voice shakes.  Find the courage to bring your ideas and dreams to life.  Don’t compare your progress with that of others.  We all need our own time to travel our own distance.  It’s perfectly OK to be different”……

Keep every chapter of your life intact, and keep on turning the pages one at a time.  Sooner or later you’ll get to a page that brings it all together, and you’ll suddenly understand why every page and chapter before it was needed…..

“Don’t be lazy. – The world doesn’t owe you anything; you owe the world something.  So stop daydreaming and start DOING.  Develop a backbone, not a wishbone.  Replace laziness with determination.  Laziness is being unable to find the time you have.  Determination is being able to find the time you don’t have.”

Being “The B”

Sometimes, to ensure things go your way, you need to summon your fiercer side. But being a bitch-on-wheels is actually counterproductive — it turns people off and makes them want to slam the door in your face. Instead ;if you walk the line between being pushy and being a pushover, you’ll up your chances of success.Some guidelines to follow…..

Find the Right Tone…..
When dealing with a frustrating situation, the right attitude makes all the difference in the world.

Not Bitchy Enough…..
Say you have a friend who never coughs up enough cash during group dinners and you’ve had it. Being passive-aggressive gets across the fact that you’re irritated, but it won’t really change anything. So skip saying “Wow, someone didn’t put in enough money….” If you don’t address the guilty party directly, you give her the opportunity to pretend she doesn’t realize you were directing it toward her.

Too Bitchy…..
Causing a big scene will get you nowhere.When you raise your voice, you put the other person on the defensive and they’ll dig in their heels.

Just Bitchy Enough…..
Use a firm, clear, but not hostile voice, and say something like “I think you miscalculated what you owe, and I really can’t afford to cover anyone else’s dinner.” You’ll feel better because you are calling her out but being decent enough to chalk it up to a mistake. Here’s what to do if you feel yourself starting to go over the edge and getting angry; stop talking and take a deep breath, Rebooting will help you keep your cool.

Not Bitchy Enough…..
Perhaps you think your guy isn’t making enough time for you. Simply stating that his actions are unfair isn’t going to get you far because you aren’t spelling out what you aren’t satisfied with and how he can fix it.

Too Bitchy…..
Saying “maybe we need some space from each other” is the wrong move because he could call your bluff. By making silly or idle threats, you diminish your credibility because the other person knows you won’t follow through, and you challenge him to a power struggle.

Just Bitchy Enough…..
Focus your criticism on the issue and how you’re feeling, not on what he’s doing wrong. For example, say “I know your boss isn’t the most understanding person, but I feel cheated out of quality time with you.” This way, you aren’t pinning it all on him. Then take the conversation one step further by offering “I miss you, so let’s get a long weekend away together on the books ASAP.” You’ve stroked his ego, so he’ll be more receptive to hearing you out and to taking action. Since a good boyfriend won’t want you to be hurt or upset, he’ll start thinking about what he can do to solve the dilemma.

Know When to Fold and When Not To…..
There comes a point in any negotiation where you are bound to reach an impasse. The following are the make-it (and break-it) moves.

Not Bitchy Enough…..
When going head-to-head with a snotty salesgirl who tells you she won’t return your purchase, you may be tempted to stomp off at the first sign that she’s unwilling to bend. But while a dramatic exit lets her know you’re peeved, you’re stuck with the unwanted merchandise.

Too Bitchy…..
When it becomes painfully obvious that what you are pressuring for just isn’t going to happen at that moment, it’s pointless to simply up the pressure (for example, asking a store clerk for her manager, then the manager for her supervisor, then the supervisor for her boss). Being persistent is great, but refusing to accept reality just makes you look pathetic.

Just Bitchy Enough…..
If your opposition senses that you’re not going to budge until the situation is resolved, they’ll realize that they’re going to have to compromise with you, Then suggest a reasonable scenario you could live with. By doing that, you spell out in concrete terms what will satisfy you, which helps move the ball down the field in your favor.

You don’t get to choose how you are going to die, or when.  You can only decide how you are going to live, right now.  Every day is a new chance to choose.  Choose to change your perspective.  Choose to flip the switch in your mind from negative to positive.  Choose to turn on the light and stop fretting about with insecurity and doubt.  Choose to do work that you are proud of.  Choose to see the best in others, and to show your best to others.  Choose to truly LIVE your life, right now……