Groundhog week: I wish I was there…..

Well this is not exactly lmiast week,  but a week before that…..Since my daughter’s birthday was approaching, I was busy making all the arrangements for the party.

My girl invited her classmates and few other friends…. yeah!  It was a huge crowd so I had to organise it at a big place. Since my husband was out of town the whole pressure was on me….although it didn’t matter much cause I love organising parties.

So ,if I loved organising parties, what was the pressure about??

My Dadaji. …… that’s what I called my grandfather.  He was around 85 yrs old ……

When he was young …..not a single day  did he take a sick leave. He was so passionate about his work…..he would call it his second family. He was in the pink of his health ……a very optimistic man. Me being his first grandchild ,I was more close and most  loved by him than the other child of the family. When I was a little girl he loved playing with me bring home yummylicous  stuff to eat . At times he would drive me down to his office . He would do his work and I would sit down with my story books or sometimes I would paint on the white A4 size sheets kept on his table…..😃

But now at 85 , he had grown feeble…. he  had experienced a mild stroke of heart attack before. One evening it started to pour heavily….. the commencing of pre monsoon showers.

We all were in the dinning area of the house , amongst our laughter and jokes  …..we heard a thud sound. Hearing the sound our ears stood  up and we all ran to the room from where the sound came. It was my Grandad’s  room ……his room was situated few steps diagonally to the dinning area . On reaching the room I was utterly shocked to see my Grandad  fallen flat on his stomach.  He was probably trying to get out of his bed when he lost his balance and fell.

My dad hurriedly dialled our family physician’s number.  Few minutes later the physician arrived , by now my dad along with other members of the family managed to bed him. The doctor examined my Dadaji and said ” its paralysis”.  It was a big huge blow on our face. We were all  terribly shaken when we learnt that the left side of his body was seized….. he was  immediately admitted to the hospital.

Now an then I would go and see him….. he grew weaker day by day,  his skin started to loosen…..falling apart from his skeletal frame. He was not eating properly and was on life ventilator.

I missed couple of days visiting him at the hospital…..arranging the venue , finalising the menu and buying return gifts for the kids.

Then came ‘The Day’….. my daughter’s birthday.  It was 5:00pm,  the kids started coming in ……within half an hour the venue place was bustling with Gorgeous teenage girls and handsome teenage boys all dressed up and to their best behaviour.

The Dj at the console played the latest tracks and the kids grooved to the music. The big brown table with the  candle lit cake was rolled in  the party room. All of us gathered around the table, with my daughter in the center making a wish before blowing her B’day  cake candle.

I stood by her side….. as she blew the candle and cut the cake….we all started to sing….”Happy birthday to you ,Happy birthday to you….. and the song continued. My daughter offered me the cake and in return did I also.

There was this heaviness inside me, something was not right…..The human  instinct as though something bad has happened or is going to happen. It was my daughter’s birthday and I should have been happy but no…..  I was feeling hopelessly sad .

After feeding my daughter with  the cake I turned around , it was my mother’s call blinking on my cellphone….. I received it and…..frooze. ” Dadaji left us” my mom worded in a low tone.

My daughter saw this and prodded me as to what happened ,who called. I narrated her what I heard over the phone.

Warm Tears rolling my eyes as I rushed to the hospital….. I entered his private room , in front of me was my Dadaji’s  still body on the bed with white sheet rolled upto his chest.

My heart was pounding fast;  I touched my grandfather’s hand…they had lost its strength. Every thing came to a stand still ….. this was the first time I had actually seen death in real. All I could hear was mourning family members.

As I kissed my grandfather’s cold forehead I was feeling guilty about missing out on those days when I didn’t meet him…….how I wish I had a time machine so that I could rewind and make up for the loss.

I can never forget this day” 5th of June”. ….my favourite family member has left for his heavenly abode…..

Dadaji;  I Miss You !!

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